Sunday, July 8, 2012

Being Abundantly For Other Women

By Margot Starbuck

My husband gives me the evil eye as I drink in a large gulp of store-brand orange juice. If there is an unwritten list of cardinal sins in our household-which I’m discovering there apparently is-drinking a large glass of orange juice, without being at death’s door from a vitamin C deficiency, is on it. Growing up as the youngest in his family, he was often shortchanged by thirsty older brothers. So, today, while he’s willing to overlook any household member sipping at a tiny glass of morning juice, a large glass at 4pm can still make him a little nutty. Both inside and outside of the kitchen, a lot of us-like my groom-operate out of a mentality of scarcity, rather than abundance.

Many of us even do it in our relationships with other women.

This is the only way I can explain how I felt when I recently saw that a popular clever female Christian blogger-like I’d be if I was popular and clever and paid any attention to my blog-had a single post which had been shared to facebook “282K” times. (Who knew that “K” was a thing that facebook’s share widget could even do?!) After doing the calculation-over ¼ million if you’re math-challenged-I started to feel a little panicky, like a failure, and quickly tried to find fault with aforementioned blogger. I wasn’t able to, but I certainly tried.

Mentality of scarcity.

No matter how you spend your days-whether you blog or craft, teach or sell, build or minister-it is tempting to be drawn into this devilish way of thinking. When you learn that a group of women friends had a girls’ night at the movies without inviting you, a mentality of scarcity can put you in a bad green-eyed place. With a mentality of abundance, though, you realize, “That sounds like fun. I wonder who else would like to do a girls’ night as much as I do? I’ll text them right now.”

To approach the world with an economy of abundance-one which trusts in a faithful Provider-is to be set free to be for other women. Specifically, we’re liberated as we act on that confidence: becoming share # 282,001 on the hot blog, buying something from the local Etsy crafter we admire, or sending a quick note of appreciation to the wildly patient supermom who has the nerve to look great in a bikini five months after the birth of baby #5.

Though it is an admittedly unlikely way, try living with a mentality of abundance when it comes to the women around you. . This week, live free.

Margot Starbuck is a communicator who is itchy to live out the kingdom Jesus ushered in. She’s planted in Durham, North Carolina with her husband Peter, their three children, and a faith community she cherishes. Visit her at


  1. WOW! Was that message ever timely! Just minutes after an argument with my husband over the way he just told me to get something done in front of the employees. Basically, it meant, you do this because everyone else is going to do pay work. That is a form of scarcity and it can make the emotions blow up (and it did). Thank you!

  2. Margot, I so resonate with this! It's a constant struggle. I like to remind myself, when caught in this mentality of scarcity, that there's room at the "top" for everyone to be functioning at their best—whatever that may be.

  3. Love this message. Thank you so much for sharing and encouraging!

  4. Thank you, Thank you , Thank you!!!! Abundance NOT scarcity...You may not have hit the 1/4 million mark but God used you to deliver a direct hit to my heart. Thank you for being obedient. :) Jimmie A. Getter, Rockford Il.

  5. Margot...your post is a breath of fresh air! Thanks for your wisdom. We can't measure ourselves by "shares" or "hits" (or pounds or salaries or square footage or anything else!) We are daughters of the King, who loves us beyond any human measure.